If You Got a Warrant I Guess You’re Gonna Come In

If You’ve Got a Warrant, I Guess You’re Gonna Come In

Now who would have thunk that I’d be sitting here mentioning the Grateful Dead and Donald Trump in the same sentence, but hey, after the FBI raided Trump’s Mar-a-Lago estate this past week looking for God knows what as evidence of the infinitely possible crimes Trump may, and more likely has, committed, what can we rely on as normal anymore?  With the former president being investigated for everything from mishandling classified information to criminal business practices to interfering in the 2020 election, the world seems to have gone topsy-turvy, mass hysteria, dogs and cats living together.  But don’t worry, folks- this is not a signal of some mass criminal conspiracy being launched with the weaponization of the Department of Justice; it is just the legal system reminding us that no one, including former presidents, is above the law and that the eyes of justice are truly blind.

Let’s be clear on this from the start- if you were once shouting “Lock her up!” in regards to Hilary Clinton’s private email server that a thorough FBI investigation concluded had zero criminal intent or function, but are now decrying the FBI raid of Donald Trump’s Mar-a-Lago estate, you are not a political dissident.  You are not some sort of activist pushing back against government overreach and a DOJ gone amok.  No, you are just an idiot who can no longer decipher between fact and fiction or recognize the duplicity and hypocrisy that has been employed in justifying the preposterous perspective that has been foisted upon you.  You are in a cult, a cult that has become so detached from reality that you have had to throw your back out contorting the truth right in front of your face in order to defend the indefensible.  And to be perfectly honest, I’m not sure there’s any way to redeem you or the blatantly fucked up worldview you now espouse.

Police direct traffic outside an entrance to former President Donald Trump’s Mar-a-Lago estate, Monday, Aug. 8, 2022, in Palm Beach, Fla. (AP Photo/Terry Renna)

So let me get this straight- you thought Hilary’s emails were enough to throw her in jail, but somehow the FBI and DOJ investigations into Trump’s criminal behavior are an abuse of power?  Yeah- that’s just plain cray cray.  We have all seen more than enough evidence to know that Trump has committed numerous serious felonies right in the face of the American public.  We have seen the video where bragged about sexually assaulting women.  We have heard the stories of numerous victims who were defrauded out of thousands of dollars by Trump’s fake university.  We have seen the records that millions of dollars were funneled out of the funds collected for Trump’s supposed charitable organizations and into his campaign funds.  We know that he bilked his supporters for millions of dollars by getting them to send him money for “Stop the Steal” campaigns, only to reappropriate that money into his personal accounts.  We have listened to the audio of him telling the Georgia Secretary of State to just “find” him 11,000 votes.  We are fully aware that a billionaire paid $750 in taxes in 2017, the year he became president and received a salary of $200k.  But you think Hilary should be the one locked up and that the Trump criminal investigations are an abuse of power?  Yeah, I no longer know how to even get reality through your thick skull.

Some of these folks who have been issuing threats of violent retribution on right wing media websites make the claim that we do not even know the specific potential charges that merited the search warrants being issued, and in fairness, they are correct.  We do not.  But Trump does.  That’s because search warrants are private documents that are not privy for public release to the media, but they do have to be given to the target of the search along with the lists of items being sought and the possible criminal charges that justified the warrant.  If Trump truly believes himself to be the victim of an unreasonable search, why wouldn’t he just release that information and expose the FBI investigation as fraudulent?  It’s not like Trump doesn’t have balls the size of Stormy Daniels’s cosmetically-enhanced breasts, so why not rip into the FBI by publishing the search warrant and claiming it as fraudulent?  Oh yeah, because Trump is completely full of shit and knows that the FBI is closing in on the very real crimes he has committed, that’s why.

In that same vein, in yet another criminal probe, Trump was recently called into answer questions for the New York Attorney General, but ended up pleading the 5th amendment, which is, in most cases, hardly a resounding indication of innocence.  I don’t know about all of you, but I have never invoked that constitutional right, probably because I have never been the subject of a criminal probe.  But don’t take my word for it.  Just listen to what Donald Trump said about taking the 5th amendment back in 2016, “So there are five people taking the Fifth Amendment, like you see on the mob, right? You see the mob takes the Fifth. If you’re innocent, why are you taking the Fifth Amendment?”  Yes, Donald- if you are innocent, WHY are YOU taking the 5th amendment?  Hmmm…..

But of course all of us who haven’t gone off the deep end know exactly what the answer to that question is.  Trump recognizes that the law is closing in on his criminal malfeasance and that his only means to escape culpability is to undermine the investigations themselves, to question the questioners, and thus cast doubt on the legitimacy of the multiples probes.  Of course, most of us see that for just what it is, more of Trump’s distortion of truth for the purposes of creating an alternative reality.  But a dangerously significant continent of his faithful followers continue to adhere to the manure he is peddling, to avow his righteousness even in the face of so much evidence to the contrary and the rest of our country shouting, “Lock him up!   Lock him up!” 


Steven Craig is the author of the best-selling novel WAITING FOR TODAY, as well as numerous published poems, short stories, and dramatic works.  Read his blog TRUTH: In 1000 Words or Less every THURSDAY at www.waitingfortoday.com